Alright fellas! Here ya go!

Short flight, window. Long flight, aisle.

No good stories really, except the time I was flying with my wife and we booked the aisle and windows seats thinking we’d either get an empty seat between us or could trade with the middle seat person if necessary. (This was in the days of flights not being packed to the gills with riff raff).

Middle seat person showed up and wouldn’t trade. “I like having both armrests, and it will do you two good to have some distance between you for the next couple hours.” Not saying she was wrong, but you can be right and still be a dick.
 
Short flight, window. Long flight, aisle.

No good stories really, except the time I was flying with my wife and we booked the aisle and windows seats thinking we’d either get an empty seat between us or could trade with the middle seat person if necessary. (This was in the days of flights not being packed to the gills with riff raff).

Middle seat person showed up and wouldn’t trade. “I like having both armrests, and it will do you two good to have some distance between you for the next couple hours.” Not saying she was wrong, but you can be right and still be a dick.

Serial killer behavior
 
Fun question! I’d rather not say publicly for lots of practical reasons I’m sure you can imagine. This feels a little wimpy, but also prudent.
 
I flew from Newark to Phx once and took an aisle. Easier access to the bathroom. If it's less than 3 hours, window.

It's weird. I'm afraid of heights but not looking down from 38,000 feet. 🤷‍♂️
 
Chica, I'd find a cave somewhere in the congo, club you silly and have my way with you caveman style. , id even hunt and gather so you'd have something in your tummy when the ball sauce trickled on down.
 
Anything but the aisle is for fucking midgets.

But this is fine for 81 percent of you dweebs.
 
Y'all know my preference.

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@CFetters_Nacho_Lover
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Vancouver to Tapei I booked the seats right in front of the middle stewardess/bathroom area where I was able to get up and stand behind my seat at any time without being in anyone's way. Will do again for future long flights
 
Short flight, window. Long flight, aisle.

No good stories really, except the time I was flying with my wife and we booked the aisle and windows seats thinking we’d either get an empty seat between us or could trade with the middle seat person if necessary. (This was in the days of flights not being packed to the gills with riff raff).

Middle seat person showed up and wouldn’t trade. “I like having both armrests, and it will do you two good to have some distance between you for the next couple hours.” Not saying she was wrong, but you can be right and still be a dick.

The aisle seat also has two arm rests. They were not right and now are a confirmed dumbass.
 
I once bought a $50 seat "upgrade" on Delta, I think, without really paying attention. It was a middle seat, next to a man, essentially a dwarf, using a seatbelt extender to its fullest. "No worries," says I, "the aisle seat is empty, I'll pop over there once doors close." Of course, right before departure, a young fellah built like a broader Cade Otton beats the door. And with a, "Sorry, man," sits down next to me. Most miserable flight ever, and I paid extra for it.
 
I once bought a $50 seat "upgrade" on Delta, I think, without really paying attention. It was a middle seat, next to a man, essentially a dwarf, using a seatbelt extender to its fullest. "No worries," says I, "the aisle seat is empty, I'll pop over there once doors close." Of course, right before departure, a young fellah built like a broader Cade Otton beats the door. And with a, "Sorry, man," sits down next to me. Most miserable flight ever, and I paid extra for it.

Stuff the midget under his seat and you'd have got your money's worth
 
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I once bought a $50 seat "upgrade" on Delta, I think, without really paying attention. It was a middle seat, next to a man, essentially a dwarf, using a seatbelt extender to its fullest. "No worries," says I, "the aisle seat is empty, I'll pop over there once doors close." Of course, right before departure, a young fellah built like a broader Cade Otton beats the door. And with a, "Sorry, man," sits down next to me. Most miserable flight ever, and I paid extra for it.

Puppysteel copypasta?
 
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