Getting a guy like this really is like getting a 5 star recruit.
Hit the portal Jimmy. Bring in sure things like this guy.
https://twitter.com/CoachLakeUDUB/status/1343777725610246145?s=20
Can someone tell Jimmy that it looks fucking retarded to capitalize every word in a sentence? We need to nip this in the bud before it gets out of control.
A few years ago, I stupidly took a temporary position at work that would spare me from rotating shifts (switching between day shifts and night shifts every week, which just destroys your body and has you living in a slight fog all the time) and put me on straight day shifts. The downside to this--and why I'm counting the days until this year is over and I can go back to my old jerb--is that the new jerb fucking suuuuuuucks. I spend most of my time rewriting operating procedures so they make sense. There are reasons why this is a horrible, thankless way to spend my time, but there are also the more minor but constant annoyances such as correcting capitalization mistakes.
You see, you work in oil, you're not exactly surrounded by a bunch of TCU MBAs. English is a second language, and swearing and grunting and cave painting is the first. For some reason--and this is universal, pretty much across every document in the whole plant--nobody who has ever worked in refining studied capitalization rules in elementary school. The result, I'm assuming, is that the neanderthal brain encounters an opportunity to capitalize a word and just punts, throwing the big letter in there for fear of accidentally missing one. Therefore, every single noun in our procedures, company emails, operating orders, etc. are capitalized. Every. Single. One.
In a way, it's even worse than capitalizing every single word or shouting in all-caps. In those cases, the person is just admitting that they're nearly illiterate right off the bat ("I'm not even going to try to pretend I have higher than a third grade education, so get your laughs in and read my tweet..."), but at least that's honest. Only capitalizing every noun is more subtle yet more dishonest: You know you're an idiot, but you're trying to pretend you're not. I can't handle it, so I stupidly waste about a quarter of my time fixing it on every document I work on.