Game of Thrones season 8 mega thread

Helm's Deep // Winterfell lighting comparison:
https://imgur.com/a/w6mzYyE

dang
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Yeah, it was bad. Again, I liked the episode from a theoretical perspective, but the darkness was just terrible.

More random thoughts;

So did the second non zombie dragon survive? I don't recall seeing him after he crashed with what I assume was Jon but couldn't tell.

Who died in the crypts? Outside of seeing Tyrion and Sansa share a moment behind a crypt, I couldn't see shit.

Melissandre not showing those magic titties again before offing herself was bullshit.

Watching the Dothraki charge and get annihilated was awesome. Really gave some gravity to the entire battle to follow. Too bad the battle to follow was so dark I couldn't see any of it.

I have been annoyed with Bran for about 5 years now. He reached peak suck last episode. And what the fuck is the deal with him? What is trying to do? What does the 3 eyed raven try to do? What is the point of this entire 8 year story arc?

The Bran shit above is why I liked Arya killing the NK. It gave meaning to her entire arc. The years of assassin training, and all her journey, to get to that point of ultimate bad assery. I feel like we never got that kind of pay off with the NK or Bran (so far). Was all that shit I watched with Bran all those years just so he could set up the "Jon Snow is really the rightful King?" Sure, that's a big deal, but fuck.

Also, nobody died. I mean fuck outside of Lyanna everyone who died sucked anyway. It was shit for realism as well. I mean thousands are slaughtered but at the very end Tarth bitch, Jamie and Sam are all backs against the wall but have survived? The only three out there still living? Bullshit. Contrived. Fuck off. Theon and Jorah was the best you could do? I wanted them to pick one of Sansa, Arya, Jon, Dany, Jamie and Tyrion and kill them. True main characters. Hell, they should have killed two of them to make it real. That was weak.

Okay, enough bitching. Who the fuck is left to fight Cersei? Sure, all the main characters and......um, welp, um, like 200 more people? Also, the Nights Watch is completely annihilated. Done. Wrecked. Then again everything north of the wall is dead as well, so fuck it, I guess. Warden of the North, or the King in the North...it doesn't fucking matter because there are only like 1000 people left total in the North. Probably less, and most of them are women and children. Look at House Umber- all dead. House Mormont? All dead. Piles of other northern houses? All dead. Wildlings? Mostly dead. It's a shitshow up north and there is nobody left to fight Cersei. That cunt.

Arya better do some serious assassin shit, and I am all in on the Cleganbowl!
 
Helm's Deep // Winterfell lighting comparison:
https://imgur.com/a/w6mzYyE

dang
Click to expand...

Yeah, it was bad. Again, I liked the episode from a theoretical perspective, but the darkness was just terrible.

More random thoughts;

So did the second non zombie dragon survive? I don't recall seeing him after he crashed with what I assume was Jon but couldn't tell.

Who died in the crypts? Outside of seeing Tyrion and Sansa share a moment behind a crypt, I couldn't see shit.

Melissandre not showing those magic titties again before offing herself was bullshit.

Watching the Dothraki charge and get annihilated was awesome. Really gave some gravity to the entire battle to follow. Too bad the battle to follow was so dark I couldn't see any of it.

I have been annoyed with Bran for about 5 years now. He reached peak suck last episode. And what the fuck is the deal with him? What is trying to do? What does the 3 eyed raven try to do? What is the point of this entire 8 year story arc?

The Bran shit above is why I liked Arya killing the NK. It gave meaning to her entire arc. The years of assassin training, and all her journey, to get to that point of ultimate bad assery. I feel like we never got that kind of pay off with the NK or Bran (so far). Was all that shit I watched with Bran all those years just so he could set up the "Jon Snow is really the rightful King?" Sure, that's a big deal, but fuck.

Also, nobody died. I mean fuck outside of Lyanna everyone who died sucked anyway. It was shit for realism as well. I mean thousands are slaughtered but at the very end Tarth bitch, Jamie and Sam are all backs against the wall but have survived? The only three out there still living? Bullshit. Contrived. Fuck off. Theon and Jorah was the best you could do? I wanted them to pick one of Sansa, Arya, Jon, Dany, Jamie and Tyrion and kill them. True main characters. Hell, they should have killed two of them to make it real. That was weak.

Okay, enough bitching. Who the fuck is left to fight Cersei? Sure, all the main characters and......um, welp, um, like 200 more people? Also, the Nights Watch is completely annihilated. Done. Wrecked. Then again everything north of the wall is dead as well, so fuck it, I guess. Warden of the North, or the King in the North...it doesn't fucking matter because there are only like 1000 people left total in the North. Probably less, and most of them are women and children. Look at House Umber- all dead. House Mormont? All dead. Piles of other northern houses? All dead. Wildlings? Mostly dead. It's a shitshow up north and there is nobody left to fight Cersei. That cunt.

Arya better do some serious assassin shit, and I am all in on the Cleganbowl!
Click to expand...

I have to...

View attachment 19185

 
I thought the episode was pretty good, some nit picking though:

- Theon's suicide charge at the Night King was lame. Sure he is going to die but at least wait for the NK to walk up to you and isolate himself from his boys. Maybe he trips over a rock and you get lucky who knows.

- Jon screaming at a zombie dragon like a pet owner going "BAD DOG!". Felt like he was giving up. Overall him and Dany fucking sucked in that episode and didn't really do anything relevant. Why wouldn't you lead with the dragons and try and microwave a good chunk of the zombies before you send out the Darthraki?

- Can't be stressed enough how retarded it was to send the women and children to the CRYPT to hide them from the Army of the Dead.

- The Night King isolating himself from his army (to go kill Bran) is worse than the Death Star having this one little hole just big enough for missles to enter and nuke the entire thing.

- Most of the fight just felt like both squads puking on each other without any cool sequences.

_ This isn't exactly just GoT related but I never understand why when someone has a certain move that is ridiculous in a show they don't just spam the shit out of it. This instance is the Night King raising the already dead warriors from the dead. Is there a recharge time? You would think the smart thing to do would be chuck that baby up every few minutes.

- We just don't know enough about the White Walkers. Sure they were made from forrest people as a modern day global warming type of tactic, but they could have been way more interesting... unless there is still a little more to be told it just felt like they built this shit up for so long and then they are dead without much explanation.

Arya's kill was awesome though, even if it was pretty much the Night King choking away the trophy. The way they built it up with the music and letting her use all of her assassin skills she had developed over course of the show was neat.

 
It did kind of feel like after centuries of fear of the Night King he went down like Mike Spinks against Tyson

Or maybe Tyson against Buster Douglass
 
Not into fantasy, but watched this shit with my wife last night. It was bad. Season Two of Westworld bad.

I feel like throwing a flashlight, ten pairs of socks, a Halloween mask, and four dildos in my clothes dryer, turning it on, filming it through the window, cutting that video together in Premiere so that no shot lasts longer than three tenths of a second, and seeing if anybody can tell it apart from any battle scene from this episode. This new Jason Bourne filming technique of "we're too lazy/poor/bad to make this look good, so cut so quickly that nobody can tell" has got to go.

Furthermore, even the 45 seconds of the episode when you could tell what was going on was a total fucking mess. I want to see a Plinkett review of this episode soooo badly! Okay, so let me get this straight:

1.) The Knight King has a boner for younger/better looking Pumpy, so you're going to use him as a lure. Best place to put him? Right in the middle of the castle where all of your important people are hiding. Not, like, out in a field somewhere to lure the army away.

2.) You've got these two dragons that have some magical inexhaustible supply of flaming burp gas or something, and they can kill a hundred zombies in two seconds. Got it. Well let's send hundreds of men in to die and become part of the opposing force before[/i] hitting the enemy army with said dragons.

3.) While we're at it, since fire kills these things, the castle is the last stronghold, and we've got these giant sources of inexhaustible fire, let's put thousands of fighters outside the castle, let most of them die, let the rest run back into the castle, then defend the castle. Meanwhile, the dragons fly around outside getting lost and stuff. I mean, packing all your fighters into the castle that you have, using those walls as a barrier, parking a dragon on top of said walls on each side, and having them melt anything that comes close would be too simple.

4.) This is an army of the undead. Safest place to hide? The crypt. What could possibly go wrong?

The retardation doesn't end with the good guys. The Knight King? Why did he wait to raise the dead in the crypt? He obviously knew they were down there. Why not just rock up to a quarter mile from the castle, raise the dead downstairs, wait for them to murder their way through the castle and open the fucking doors, then crush the army outside and walk in like a boss?

If I had a chin for every time I told my wife, "That's just fucking stupid!" I'd dominate Doog-bot's rankings when they come out in 2023. The witch lighting the trench on fire? Laaaame. The guys on horses charging an undead army they can't see? Stuuuuupid. The dragon queen lady just sitting there on the ground with her dragon for like five minutes for no reason, knowing that the place was swarming with zombies? Just totally fucking contrived. The guy who came to the dragon queen lady's rescue doing so because he hears a dragon scream and just assumes that she must be in trouble, never mind the fact that it sounded exactly like a thousand other dragon screams that happened throughout the episode? Come on. The constantly repeated Bruce Lee fight scenes, where a main character is surrounded by a billion zombies, but the zombies come at them one at a time in a stream of endless fodder? Fucking stupid. The same half-second scene of guys protecting Pumpy shooting flaming arrows at zombies as they are overrun, only to be revisited a minute later to see them--once again--shooting flaming arrows at zombies as they are overrun? Ugh. Main character either in my dryer full of flashlights and dildos or in a battle with zombies (who can tell?), either good guys or zombies being split open left and right (who can tell?), main character seemingly overrun by a mass of undead humanity and outnumbered fifty to one, somehow said main character still alive and fighting other waves of zombies next time it cuts back to them? Even though quite literally EVERYBODY around them has been massacred? Suck a dick, HBO.

Brief summary: The writers seemed to have a Point B that they wanted to get to from Point A. The journey between is one that makes no sense at any point and during which every single incident in the episode that helped them get there (dragon sitting on the ground for eternity so that it can be enveloped by zombies and drop white haired gal on the ground, main character appearing in a tree above the White King inexplicably, etc.) is poorly developed, ridiculously implausible, or comic book movie nonsensical. Not a single thing happened in that episode that made any sense or followed logically from the setup. This was the 2016 playoff semifinal of big budget television episodes.
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this is a lot of verbiage for someone not into fantasy
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Usually I dick around on the laptop while my wife watches the show. This time, though, I had to close the damned laptop because the light from the screen made watching the episode impossible, so I had to watch the damned shit too. I just had no idea it would be so bad.
 
Sums it up really well imo:
https://www.gamespot.com/articles/review-game-of-thrones-episode-3-season-8-subverti/1100-6466520/
Click to expand...

Agree

I've never read the books or much cared beyond mindless entertainment but this nails it for even a casual fan
Click to expand...

The White Walkers. What are they? What do they want? Why do they want to kill us? Why do they want Craster’s sons? What happened to them for 8000 years? Are they controlling the seasons? Why did they return now? Do they have a right to exist? Is peaceful coexistence possible?
 
Sums it up really well imo:
https://www.gamespot.com/articles/review-game-of-thrones-episode-3-season-8-subverti/1100-6466520/
Click to expand...

Agree

I've never read the books or much cared beyond mindless entertainment but this nails it for even a casual fan
Click to expand...

The White Walkers. What are they? What do they want? Why do they want to kill us? Why do they want Craster’s sons? What happened to them for 8000 years? Are they controlling the seasons? Why did they return now? Do they have a right to exist? Is peaceful coexistence possible?
Click to expand...

This. The whole White Walker mystery is what pulled me into the show and it just feels so unsatisfying not having so many questions answered. I still think that stare down with Bran at the end meant something.
 
I thought Bran was going to third eye into the dead dragon or the Night King himself

Would have been cool
 
Sums it up really well imo:
https://www.gamespot.com/articles/review-game-of-thrones-episode-3-season-8-subverti/1100-6466520/
Click to expand...

Agree

I've never read the books or much cared beyond mindless entertainment but this nails it for even a casual fan
Click to expand...

The White Walkers. What are they? What do they want? Why do they want to kill us? Why do they want Craster’s sons? What happened to them for 8000 years? Are they controlling the seasons? Why did they return now? Do they have a right to exist? Is peaceful coexistence possible?
Click to expand...

Looks like you are going to need a book to read.
 
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