Alright fellas! Here ya go!!!

[EsophagealFeces]

Spent first married Valentines Day in a meeting campaigning (eventually successfully) to dismiss a volunteer who had solicited sexts from a minor.

Spent last Valentines Day officiating the funeral of a man who blew his head off. Coincidentally the father of the minor from the prior story (thirteen years later). BTW the girl grew up to be a stripper.
Self flagged for no pics.
GRIM

Wait, are you actually a pastor?

 

[dnc]

Spent first married Valentines Day in a meeting campaigning (eventually successfully) to dismiss a volunteer who had solicited sexts from a minor.

Spent last Valentines Day officiating the funeral of a man who blew his head off. Coincidentally the father of the minor from the prior story (thirteen years later). BTW the girl grew up to be a stripper.
Self flagged for no pics.
GRIM

Wait, are you actually a pastor?

huh?

 

[EsophagealFeces]

Spent first married Valentines Day in a meeting campaigning (eventually successfully) to dismiss a volunteer who had solicited sexts from a minor.

Spent last Valentines Day officiating the funeral of a man who blew his head off. Coincidentally the father of the minor from the prior story (thirteen years later). BTW the girl grew up to be a stripper.
Self flagged for no pics.
GRIM

Wait, are you actually a pastor?

huh?

I knew you were a sermon seeker, but in 15 years of interacting with you on message boreds, I’m surprised I never caught that you’re a sermon producer. Given my background, I’m a little ashamed of myself.

 

[RaceBannon]

The Reverend dnc

 

[dnc]

Spent first married Valentines Day in a meeting campaigning (eventually successfully) to dismiss a volunteer who had solicited sexts from a minor.

Spent last Valentines Day officiating the funeral of a man who blew his head off. Coincidentally the father of the minor from the prior story (thirteen years later). BTW the girl grew up to be a stripper.
Self flagged for no pics.
GRIM

Wait, are you actually a pastor?

huh?

I knew you were a sermon seeker, but in 15 years of interacting with you on message boreds, I’m surprised I never caught that you’re a sermon producer. Given my background, I’m a little ashamed of myself.

Shame is mine not yours, clearly not good at what I do.

 

[dnc]

The Reverend dnc

It's a tuff grift but somebody has to do it

 

[Maceothecat]

it was my birthday.
i turned 60.
i spent it alone again.

 

[dnc]

it was my birthday.
i turned 60.
i spent it alone again.

Plenty of crazy cat ladies in the sea, you'll find the right one.

 

[huskyhooligan]

Spent first married Valentines Day in a meeting campaigning (eventually successfully) to dismiss a volunteer who had solicited sexts from a minor.

Spent last Valentines Day officiating the funeral of a man who blew his head off. Coincidentally the father of the minor from the prior story (thirteen years later). BTW the girl grew up to be a stripper.
Self flagged for no pics.
GRIM

Wait, are you actually a pastor?

Based on his internet bully prowess, I'd say he's a mortician. The internet bullying helps keep business booming.

 

[EsophagealFeces]

Spent first married Valentines Day in a meeting campaigning (eventually successfully) to dismiss a volunteer who had solicited sexts from a minor.

Spent last Valentines Day officiating the funeral of a man who blew his head off. Coincidentally the father of the minor from the prior story (thirteen years later). BTW the girl grew up to be a stripper.
Self flagged for no pics.
GRIM

Wait, are you actually a pastor?

Based on his internet bully prowess, I'd say he's a mortician. The internet bullying helps keep business booming.

Makes sense, BULLY sense!

 

[PurpleJ]

it was my birthday.
i turned 60.
i spent it alone again.

Plenty of crazy cat ladies in the sea, you'll find the right one.

Purrrrrr

 

[dtd]

Spent first married Valentines Day in a meeting campaigning (eventually successfully) to dismiss a volunteer who had solicited sexts from a minor.

Spent last Valentines Day officiating the funeral of a man who blew his head off. Coincidentally the father of the minor from the prior story (thirteen years later). BTW the girl grew up to be a stripper.
Self flagged for no pics.
GRIM

Wait, are you actually a pastor?

huh?

I knew you were a sermon seeker, but in 15 years of interacting with you on message boreds, I’m surprised I never caught that you’re a sermon producer. Given my background, I’m a little ashamed of myself.

Wait, are you actually a pastor?

 

[dirtysouwfdawg]

Spent first married Valentines Day in a meeting campaigning (eventually successfully) to dismiss a volunteer who had solicited sexts from a minor.

Spent last Valentines Day officiating the funeral of a man who blew his head off. Coincidentally the father of the minor from the prior story (thirteen years later). BTW the girl grew up to be a stripper.
Self flagged for no pics.
GRIM

Wait, are you actually a pastor?

huh?

I knew you were a sermon seeker, but in 15 years of interacting with you on message boreds, I’m surprised I never caught that you’re a sermon producer. Given my background, I’m a little ashamed of myself.

background as a detective?