Out of all of the places to ask, you came here to DJ’s loony bin?
You made the right decision, because I know all of it. I was there. Like, literally - there. But that’s not how I know, nobody would ever tell me shit, let alone about this. They’d have these Duck luncheons or fundraisers or whatever at the MAC and my stepdad and dentist would go and I did when I was younger. I flesh out the narrative.
It was Bellotti’s idea. It was Barry Alvarez idea. He decided to do the head coach in waiting thing around then so people would stop wondering if Wisconsin football would go back to being dog shit when he had a coronary or retired. So Bellotti took Barry’s idea and came up with it. Or someone implanted in him that he came up with it.
Bellotti wanted to retire soon. He always wanted a legacy. That’s why he didn’t go to Ohio State or UCLA, not just to keep his PERS pension. He didn’t want to flop and be seen as a one trick pony. Like many college football coaches or successful people in competitive fields he’s almost certainly a sociopath. Anyway, he wanted credit where credit is due. It took Rich Brooks 10 years from getting a winning season to winning the conference. In six years Bellotti got a Cotton Bowl loss, screwed out of a Rose Bowl in 2000 by Joey Pianos and his 5 picks, and fucked by the BCS into a Fiesta Bowel instead of the national championship.
How did he do it? Bellotti was a CEO and a good football coach. Dude was an epic glad hander, talker, and had the type of sliding scale morality you get from someone with that mustache.
But mostly he hired great coordinators and was willing to adjust ahead of the times because that was how you won at Oregon. But fuckers kept taking his OCs, other than Ludwig. Koetter, Tedford, Pete gone before, because Bellotti had to make a Sophie’s Choice. Then he realized you can’t win with just with some good recruits and a good system when Pete Carroll is trotting out a roster of NFL players. So he switched to the spread. Got Crowton.
2006 was shitty with Dixon and Leaf taking turns throwing interceptions. But Bellotti knew this offense was the future. AND THEN THAT CRAZY FUCK Les Miles hires away Crowton. Mormon Crowton feels obliged to do him a favor and tells him about this chubby madman in bumfuck Massachusetts or New Hampshire.
You know what happens in 2007. Crowton and LSU win the title and Oregon comes within a knee ligament of losing in the championship game with a Heisman winner. Bellotti knew Chip was the golden goose before they embarrassed Michigan. It wasn’t just a magic playbook it was a devoted system.
And that system was going to get Mike Bellotti the godamn Rose Bowl he’s wanted for so long. Shit, maybe a notional championship. Everyone was loving this. But Chip started getting job offers. Not just OC at bigger school. Head Coach at lower tier SEC school type offers. So, head coach in waiting for Kelly and Mike uses him for another couple of years and then retires to the AD job and then retires with a huge pension.
But people, and by people I mean the ones that count, started getting nervous that everyone wanted the chubby golden goose. Bellotti wanted another year or two since 2008 was kind of a bust. But a $3 million handshake (Bobby Bowden made $2mil then) and a lot of creative accounting to get $40k a month is a good persuader.
He tried to fuck around as AD because that’s what Barry Alvarez did. Executed some orders, got bored, went to ESPN, took some coaching interviews to remain relevant or some shit. Got honorary posts and a ton of money.
Sorry it wasn’t as shady as you’d like. I do have a story about Herman Ho-Ching being paid by Nick Saban’s people to fumble to Amp something from Michigan State. Maybe it wasn’t Saban’s people, and maybe it wasn’t on purpose but it’s more entertaining.
