Miami's resurgence highlights college football's Week 3

[creepycoug]

Good news for Duck fans.

There won't be a coaching job open there next season.

@creepycoug - true?

You are not only witty and beautiful, but you are wise to consult with me on these questions.

My answer: it is a long season. Tell me what happens on the road against Clempsun, and I will tell you about coaching opportunities.

For you see, we? at Miami do not share a similar culture to that of the University of Washington faithful. They of so much USC-really-respects-us cuckery. @YellowSnow They who would take satisfaction from "we really hung in there with Bama didn't we?" Those "other" people who rationalize losing a Rose Bowl "because it was Buck and not Wisky." The program which has engendered a culture of star players who will "sit this one out" in important post-season play. Miami don't play that stuff.

At Miami, we? demand #1 or bust. We? are not happy to play it close. We? will not take satisfaction in moral victories and putting up a good fight against Clempson, our neove riche billbilly conference brethren. We? also don't drink lattes on our boats.

If we? brake Lawrence's leg and run the ball down their fucking throats and embarrass them in their stupid stadium and take a piss on that dumb rock they like to touch on our way out, then get back to me.

If we? lose close, Manny is on the block and we? will be calling Mario to bring that tuff fucking mentality back to Coral Gables.

Cook it.

Are you sure that's how the upper campus at Miami thinks in 2020? We've been waiting for Miami to be back an awful long time.

December 31, 2004 Peach Bowl Florida W 27–10
December 30, 2005 Peach Bowl LSU L 3–40
December 31, 2006 MPC Computers Bowl Nevada W 21–20
December 27, 2008 Emerald Bowl California L 17–24
December 29, 2009 Champs Sports Bowl Wisconsin L 14–20
December 31, 2010 Sun Bowl Notre Dame L 17–33
December 28, 2013 Russell Athletic Bowl Louisville L 9–36
December 27, 2014 Independence Bowl South Carolina L 21–24
December 26, 2015 Sun Bowl Washington State L 14–20
December 28, 2016 Russell Athletic Bowl West Virginia W 31–14
December 30, 2017 Orange Bowl (NY6) Wisconsin L 24–34
December 27, 2018 Pinstripe Bowl Wisconsin L 3–35
December 26, 2019 Independence Bowl Louisiana Tech L 0–14

We?

Listen up pork chop. You? are 4-8 in Bowels since your last Rose Bowl win, including notable victories in the Fight Hunger, Heart of Dallas and Las Vegas Bowels with (arguably) the best coach you've had in 30 year years. In that same time frame, you have hired and fired 5 coaches, and just had the Captain of the Lake quit on you.

This is all to say, you? more than most can understand that getting a good coach is a miss much, much, much more often than it is a hit, and you can go an entire generation without getting it right.

Trust me, I am fully aware I'm throwing stones in a glass house here, but the Tony Montana Miami routine is schtick at this point. Nobody is scared of Miami becoming a titan.

I'm not sure what it has ever meant to be "scared" of a program reasserting itself. But I can assure you that programs who have been having an easy time raiding and recruiting the 305 - Alabama, LSU, Georgia, among others - would entirely prefer Miami remain in the funk in which they've been. The status quo has been good to them.

They've won 5 national titles under 3 different coaches since 1983 and have been within an eyelash of two more. Yes, they are a coach away from not taking solace in hanging with Bama for a half. They are as scared - or something - of their potential resurgence as Washington and Oregon are of USC's.